The Reluctant Artist

I often get comments while drawing cartoons at events that go something like, "You have a real gift for drawing" or "I wish I could draw like you, but it has to be a natural talent". 

I always thank them for their kind words but they're very wrong. I'm not gifted nor naturally talented, not by any stretch of the imagination. 

In an unrelated incident...

Ludwig von Beethoven had just finished a performance of one of his own compositions and was surrounded by a crowd of his many admirers. Each person was generous with the outpourings of praise and admiration in the direction of the famous composer. 

One woman gushed "If only God had given me such a gift of genius." to which Beethoven turned an unfriendly look in her direction and said coldly, "It isn't genius, madame. Neither is it magic. You can be as good as I. All you have to do is practice on your piano every day, eight hours a day for forty years."

Mad Magazine was my preferred literature of choice

It may be odd for many people to hear this, but I never had an ambition to be a caricature artist. It has never crossed my mind in all the years prior to finding it to be a profitable venture. At the same time, no one should make the mistake of thinking I didn't like drawing and making my own gags since childhood, but it was somewhat of a personal thing that I kept mostly to myself. 

A hungry Pauper

However, the possibility of drawing caricatures of others, live and in public, with dozens of people watching me do so, was the certainly not on my list of things I wanted to do. Without going too deeply into it, I decided to give it a try only when unemployment compelled me to do so. 

It didn't just come to me, though. It's taken many thousands of tries to get to the point where the public will pay for it. I sometimes tell people after receiving their gracious comments about my "natural gift" that it's no gift. It's lots and lots of practice.

I Must Confess

 I'm a veteran of the U.S. Marines and I'm very proud to have served and honored to have been chosen as a Marine. The times, good and bad, were unforgettable and the victories and failures I experienced were monumental.  I love the men I served with, and we developed bonds that were among the strongest possible.

You can take the man out 

of the Marines but...

Can you take the Marines 

out of the man?

Even after being honorably discharged, I was so attached to those days that they became spectacles through which everything I experienced was filtered. It was as though I was still living as a Marine many years afterwards and I didn't want to betray that perceived loyalty. I thought that by not remembering and honoring my days of service in everything I did as a civilian, I was somehow being disloyal to the U.S. Marines and to the men with whom I served. We kept in touch by social media, and I committed to a reunion I could scarcely afford to attend and was consumed with keeping in good standing with them. 

I ain't alone

Many veterans do so, and it is like being frozen in time and worst of all it's paralyzing to one's mindset as it was to mine. It's as though an anchor and chain were attached to my ankle and has prevented me from making any real progress. It affected my decisions, my opinions, my work, my business, my marriage, my family, my friendships, everything. As I aged and the distance between the present and the past grew, the anchor became bigger and heavier with each passing year. It kept me worse than a failure. 

It kept me mediocre. 

But then, one day recently, I was hit with what seemed like a cold bucket of water when, through a series of revealing circumstances, I realized these men with whom I served, and the U.S. Marines, have nothing to do with me presently. The VA facilities I've been a part of for years are full of men living mediocre lives at best, and some on the verge of suicide because they have chosen to come under the dominion of ghosts from their past. Even though I never saw myself as one of those poor souls, I see now I was one of them, chained to events of long ago that I have allowed to taint everything I came into contact with. 

Where were they?

But now I realize the men I served with didn't go to my wedding, they weren't present at the birth of my children, weren't there to console me when my father died, nor have they been with me at any other time in my life. In fact, they show very little interest in what I do, and I must admit, I feel the same way about them. 

All of me

But there are others in my life now, today, who have been with me through those times, and it is they who deserve to have all of me. They are the ones who want all of me. Those are the ones where my loyalties should lie. 

As I mentioned, my unit has reunions from time to time and for me to attend would be an unjustifiable expense and anyway, all it amounts to is a bunch of us getting drunk and talking about old times. These men I had little in common with then and the same is true now. 

Yes, my time as Marine was truly special and unforgettable, even unmentionable, but it doesn't define me. It's only one ingredient in what makes me who I am and there were many other adventures that also make me who I am, but I am not chained to a single event or time period. Trying to flavor my meal with one ingredient makes for a bad dish.

I have finally broken loose from the anchor and said, 

"Men, I love you and I'll never forget you or those times, but it's long overdue for me to move on." 

Oh, I'll still wear Marine hats and T-shirts with documents, awards and photos on my wall and desk, but no longer will they dominate the space, and they are accompanied by photos and memorabilia of other unforgettable people and events in my life.

"Maybe we'll see each other again in the future, men, but good-bye, for now. "

Spring in Spring

Spring Fling in Spring in the Spring

On Thursday I had a job at Hewlett Packard in Spring Texas for there annual spring fling complete with a live band, games, and plenty of food. I've always said the hardest part of my job is smelling the delicious food catered at these events. I'm always invited to fix a plate for myself but who has time when I have a line of people waiting to get made fun of with pen and ink. 

This was an event for only the employees so there were no kids (and since I'm on the subject), I prefer an all adult clientele. I also find it interesting that the "adults" sometimes act more like children than the real children do. 

For example, I was there with two other artists and, needless to say, we all have different styles of drawing, and some artistic styles, being a subjective endeavor, are preferred by the client. The artist next to me drew more in a portrait style so a lady wanted to be drawn by him and not me, but as circumstances would have it, she ended up sitting in my hot seat, and I must confess, I really let her have it with my exaggerations. 

The styles of different artists are often striking. I mentioned my constituent to my left draws in more of a portrait style, still a caricature, but the exaggerations are mild whereas my style is more bold and I often discover at least two types of customers. One may be the type that is easy going with a healthy sense of humor knowing a caricature is supposed to be funny looking. The other type wants a drawing that makes them look like a cute, Disney-ish, cartoon, which isn't my style. So sorry.

I do drawings on an individual basis and to see more examples or order one of your own click here.

Whats Your Tomato? By Bob Doll

The Dark Side of Sunday Morning

Things losers say

• I hate Mondays.
• It's not my job.
• I'll do it tomorrow.
• It's okay if I'm late.
• I can't afford it.
• It's too hard.
• It's not my fault.
• It's not fair.
• I'm too tired.
• I love weekends.

It may seem strange to think "I love weekends" is something losers say, and seems out of place, but putting emphasis on the weekend, detracts from the other days of the week and is a kind of backdoor way of saying, "I hate Mondays".  Maybe you really do like Saturday, because that's when you get to do things that you don't do any during the week but isn't that true of any day of the week? There are things I do on Wednesday that I would not dare do on Sunday.

"To whom much is given, much is required."

When we receive blessings and responsibilities, we are called to a higher standard of accountability, and accepting responsibility is a blood tenet of people in a position of leadership or influence. The words we use reflect our thoughts and attitudes and I often imagine what the students in my drawing classes would think of me if I told them "Drawing is too hard" or if I told a client of mine "it's okay if I'm late". 

My leaders in the Marines Corps (at least the good ones) drilled into our psyche at every opportunity...

"Your mindset is your greatest weapon".

It didn't matter how well trained we were, how fit, energetic, well fed, or well-armed we were. Winning or losing battles begins and ends between the ears. The same is true no matter what we do, whether we're Marines or not. 

If words are a reflection of our mindset, then it stands to reason that changing our words also changes our minds, then naturally our circumstances change.

• I'll make this a good week.
• How can I do this better?
• It's important to be on time.
• How can I afford this?
• I want to learn how to do this.
• How can I help?
• I'll try again.

I'm Not a Tree

 

Why do I do my own cooking, grind my own coffee beans and bake my own bread? Why do I have a business of my own and write my own books? It has something to do with creating my own environment; one that I can not only have better control of but also one that suits me better than others can. I don’t want to live in someone else’s realm. I want to live in my own.

I was created in God’s image, in his likeness and God is creative and orderly. He has given me the ability to be the same, and it’s already in me, in my possession. I don’t have to ask for it.

When I was young, everything was new to me, and I savored the uniqueness of everything. Life was a learning experience, fresh and original but as I aged, I noticed how new things slowly began to grow further and further apart. I began hearing the same stories repeated like so many re-runs of old TV programs. There's nothing new under the sun and often, I discovered, people tend to repeat common knowledge as if it’s new information.

As time goes by, it’s not unusual for adults to grow complacent and even depressed from being bored from many days being a duplicate of the day before. Being in business for myself allows me to learn new things about earning money I would not have otherwise known. Someone also said, in fact I think it was me, “when I want to read a good book, I’ll write one”, so the same goes for the learning experience of drawing and writing which are never ending learning experiences.

I’ve also been known to say, “my favorite food is my own”. Learning to cook delicious food is also a learning experience as well as the proper grind of coffee beans for certain applications and the different flavors of coffee from around the world.

I make my own bread because not only is it better tasting than the stuff supermarkets and giant bakeries churn out, but also for how therapeutic it can be. It takes patience and experience to learn how to make the perfect loaf of bread. I love making plum pudding and it’s become a Christmas tradition for my family.

Jeffery Gitomer’s book, The Little Red Book of Selling, and in many other books, as well as some of the world’s greatest minds, touts creating an environment conducive to my life’s objectives and intentions. If I don’t like the way things are then I can change it. I can change where I live, who my friends are, my job, my attitude, my philosophy, my health, my relationships. As I age it becomes more important to me.

The Professional Loafer

 

                          

They say if you chase two rabbits, you'll lose both. It's also been said to do one thing and do it better than anybody. There is also the school of thought that the best way to earn money is by diversified income and to do more than one thing. So, who's right? 

Is it possible to do one main thing and have side gigs like a job or is it recommended to have just one thing but use it in different ways?

My late mentor once said we must answer "yes" to three things to have true success at something:

1. Can you make money doing it?
2. Are you good at it?
3. Do you like doing it?

The first thing that has be considered, and is of paramount importance is that a person must make money. Without it then there is no need to continue reading the rest of this article. I'm not talking about a hobby or something to do in my spare time, but is there a way to earn money doing what I'm doing or doing what I want to do?

Second, am I good at it? I once knew someone who wanted to be a professional skateboarder and even though I was horrified at the prospect of such a career, I enquired at the potential of earning money doing it. I must admit, with reservations, there was the outside chance that money could be earned at it and after reluctantly checking off the first box, I asked if he was good at riding a skateboard. Even though he thought he was a talented rider, and to his credit, he practiced often, even at the sacrifice of schoolwork, I discovered he wasn't very good at riding a skateboard. He could ride one, to be sure, but he didn't have the skills to do so professionally. Not by a long shot. 

Unfortunately, I couldn't check the second box. He didn't follow the formula for a successful career as a skateboarder.

The third thing is liking what you do. I knew a guy who was an accountant and got paid decent money for it but didn't like doing it. As a result, he never rose above the mediocre level.

I had to honestly assess myself about my career endeavors in  drawing. I've gotten so much heat over the years about how there "just isn't enough money in drawing" to make a decent living at it, but I proved that theory wrong years ago. 

I'm pretty good at it and I like doing it, especially compared to the other lax jobs I've tried. So, guess what? All the boxes are checked.

My next endeavor is how to diversify drawing?

Why Are You Doing This?

                         

Indoctrinated

 I've Often written in the past and published in Shut Up Draw and What's Your Tomato, stories of how my childhood and early adulthood was overly influenced by the opinions and expectations of those closest to me and societal norms in general. 

"Drawing is nice" I was told  "but you have to have a real career."

"You can't make any money with that."

"You got to work to make your boss happy."

The mantras and opinions are still ringing in my ears and in fact, those bits of "helpful" advice perpetually, even today, find their way back around to me. 

As a young person I accepted this indoctrination as the truth and I told myself, 

"All these people can't be wrong"

It's true that when it came to my family members, they did want the best for me. Well, in many ways, but as far as the clamor of the rest, little did I know, they did not want the best for me. All they wanted was to be right because misery loves company. 

As far as my family was concerned, all they've known was working to earn a living and that's all that was important. No one said I had to like my job because the important thing was to just do it and please the boss. I respect that philosophy as long people decide they have little else to contribute, but as a kid, all I heard from my father was how he hated his job, and he complained about it often. 

Being raised by a single mom, I was alone a great deal of the time, left very much on my own for hours each day without supervision, guidance or the discipline a growing boy needs because Mom was working so much just trying to keep us fed and housed. 

Was that a great way to demonstrate to a child that having a job was the best way to go? 

The ones with whom I've crossed paths who saw the way, before I ever did, who either purposely or incidentally verbalized it, are the ones I would have benefited from listening to. People like my closest friends, girlfriends, my instructors from college or my coworkers in the meager jobs with which we all suffered.

"Why are you doing this?" I was often asked when they saw how my talents lie somewhere other than punching a time clock at 6 am and working 12 hours a day, 6 days a week.

My answer had the mediocre stamp of approval on it. 

"Because I have bills to pay"

So, I continued doing the "same old same old" and my dissatisfaction slid into destructive thoughts like anger, sorrow, self-loathing which then manifested into behaviors like putting the needs of others before my own even at my own detriment. It also lead to depression and melancholy. My sincere unhappiness and perpetual lack of sufficient income did not support the notion put forward by others that my purpose in life was to get a job and make my boss happy.  

They told me it would be better than this

Things are changing and it took long enough. Even though I've come to the conclusion that the popular narrative is wrong, I've still not realized the income but at least it's no worse than before. I still have my doubts. The echoes of my early days still resound, and they have never really gone away. "What if I've made a huge mistake?" I often ask myself. 

"What if I'm wrong and 

all those others were right?"

I've proven to myself that it isn't necessary to earn a living by "pleasing the boss". Isn't it ironic that the very suggestion I was given as a young person was actually the worst I could have possibly been given because my record of "pleasing the boss" has been dismal, to put it nicely.